How I deal with anxiety and depression.





I just don't. 

I'll try to make this blog as short as possible.

*Before you start reading I want to let you know that life sucks. Whatever it is that has got you feeling some type of way, let it go. It can either be school, family members, friends, bf or gf, just let that negativity out of your life. See, before you come judging me for what I'm about to write down, take a good look at yourself in the mirror and realize that I'm not better than you and you're not better than me. We're all going through our own battles so please, let's just not judge each other but let's start helping one another.*

I've had depression for at least 13 years and anxiety for 5-6 years. I can't tell you why or how I got to how I am today because I honestly do not remember. All I can tell you is that getting up isn't easy by I do hope it's worth it. I will not apologize for writing how I feel, this is the only way I can vent because I have no one. Please respect that. If you don't know what depression and anxiety is I will be posting a link in the blog so you can educate yourself.

Moving to Florida has been one of the most impacting and best decisions I've made so far. It wasn't easy leaving my family just to get a better education. It sucked. Being away from my mom and brother suck. I miss the dogs, my family and friends. I even miss the coqui before I go to sleep. Pero I'm here trying to get my life together. Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful for being in Miami and I'm "blessed".

I feel alone most of the times. I don't have anyone to talk to. People these days spend more time on their phone than they do actually socializing. No one wants to sit down and ask you how you're feeling. No one wants to actually get to know you and no one actually pays attention when you speak.  Whatever you say to them comes through one ear and goes out the other. I feel tired most of the time. I barely eat because I lost my appetite years ago. The thing that sucks the most is that when I finally open up to someone they don't appreciate me and they just leave.

I know a lot of people out there have it worst than I do. I pray every night for everyone that I know and their families and so on. But it sucks not to have a single friend here.

I apologize if I ever made you feel like you're less, if I didn't listen to you when you needed someone to hear you out, if I wasn't there when you needed me. Just know that I am here. I'm sorry for failing you.

But in time, all will get better. Even if it takes years you'll smile again. There's at least one person in this world that cares deeply about you. You won't lose this battle, you will get up and shine even brighter than you did before. We just need to get polished now and then. It's hard but it's worth every single tear and headache. I'm glad you're reading this, I'm glad you're breathing and I'm happy you're here.

Thank you for reading this. It may be a messy blog post but my head hurts a little less by writing this. I have a few tips about dealing with anxiety and depression. I'll list them below:


  1. Journaling: Having a journal has helped me a lot, especially when I'm angry. I just take it and write down everything that I'm feeling at the moment until I feel calm. I NEVER read my journal, it's just there for when I need to write something. 
  2. Pets: Believe it or not, pets instantly calm me down. Mansi's dog (Hazel) always makes me feel better and Vane's cat (Nala) makes me laugh every time I see her. 
  3. Cold shower: if you just need to cry and blow off steam, take a cold shower. Trust me, it works.
  4. Walking: Whenever I need to clear my head I walk. I go to campus and back. It helps me make "good" decisions.
  5. Talk to someone: there's always someone who doesn't make you feel like a bother. Try talking to them and let it all out.
Don't blame yourself for feeling this way. It's not our fault. But just know you're not alone in this, a lot of us are going through something similar. Don't take it out on yourself (I apologize, words are a bit difficult these days). You're worth so much more and you WILL get through this. 


links:


I hope my tips helped you like they help me. Also, remember there's nothing wrong with looking for help. Going to therapy isn't bad, it's good that you take that first step in helping yourself out. Thank you for reading this. Have a beautiful day/night. 

Much love, 
Adri. 





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